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COWBOY POETRY

The Outhouse Ordeal

I remember one day,
a privy I’d built;
‘twas somewhat lopsided
…it had quite a tilt.

It was two trees together
with a log for a seat,
and when it was finished,
why, it looked pretty neat.

I knew without doubt
a purpose it’d serve,
if you had to go bad
and had lots of nerve.

As the days went by
it served us quite well,
then one day, no warning,
it went all to hell.

As I sat on the log
with my britches pulled down,
the whole thing turned loose
and I fell to the ground!

The nails I’d used
weren’t quite long enough,
and I fell right on in
to that bad smellin’ stuff!

An embarrassing thing
this turned out to be.
Why, who’d of ever thought
it would have happened to me?

As I tried getting out
things just got worse,
so I hollered for help,
and the boys brought a horse.

Jake flipped me a loop
dallied and tugged;
I finally came out,
all embarrassed and smug.

The boys were all laughing,
and them I don’t blame;
with my pants to my knees,
why, I must have looked lame.

So a lesson I learned,
and I learned without fail,
next time I’d use
a long enough nail!
******

by TJ Casey
Copyright 1988
 

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